It does get easier, trust me. It will remain in your thoughts, but one day, you’ll be able to think about it without feeling regret, pain or even hope. I know how cliché that sounds, but it will be slightly bittersweet. And as satisfying it might be to reveal the truth, I do agree that it’d be better if you didn’t. It might hurt you more in the end. Whenever you feel unsure or overwhelmed, please message me if you ever need anything, xx.
I’ve been in a similar situation in which I was half in love with someone, but he was seeing someone else. He never left his girlfriend for me, but he was always making me hope. We never had sex, but he hurt me in more ways than I couldn’t explain. You said you were convinced he would be unfaithful if you were together. I’m not pointing fingers and saying you were the other woman, believe me, because you could do the same to me, but I guess it shows to prove that he is unfaithful, and he doesn’t deserve either you or his girlfriend. I’m not sure if you want advice on how to move on from him or not, but I would suggest putting yourself in his girlfriend’s position. If you were his girlfriend, could you forgive him for cheating on you? Would you really want to be with someone who is capable of doing that to someone he’s supposed to love and be loyal to? I know there are some people who we just can’t seem to move on from no matter what we try, or no matter what they do to us. It’s a feeling of wanting them so much that you’re blind to all the warning signs. But you must have been hesitant for some reason. Subconsciously you probably knew he could potentially hurt you really bad. Ask yourself, would you put yourself through the potential pain and heartache just to have his attention and “love” again? If you think it’s worth it, it’s your choice. But from my experience, I forced myself to move on, and though it hurt me, I learned from the experience, and I won’t put myself in that position anymore.
I hope my words have been able to help you, even if just a little. Please message me if you’d like to talk more. And thank you for trusting in me to give you advice.
Best of luck, xx.
I don’t think you’re selfish at all. I think it is completely understandable why you need a break. I know it’s easier for me to say this from a third person view, but I think a possible way to go on a break with him without having him hurt himself is to tell him how this relationship has been hard on you, and the pressure of having the safety of his life in your hands is difficult to handle. I do think, however, disappearing from his life completely might push him over the edge. Perhaps you should tell him that you do still care about him, and you are willing to stay in contact if he needs any support, but you need some time for yourself. Please remember that by doing this, you are NOT being selfish. As harsh as this may sound, I do think your boyfriend is being a little selfish, but I understand he is going through a hard time. Still, he should not put all that pressure and guilt on you. Hopefully this has helped, even a little bit, xx!
I don’t think I was every clinically depressed, but in my last year of high school, there were a lot of suicides in my city, some of them my own friends. It took a toll on me. I was very, very sad, and sometimes, I would feel numb, or I would start crying uncontrollably. But I think it had more to do with grief rather than depression. Sometimes when I feel extremely sad, I indulge in things that I enjoy; for instance, reading in the tub, watching films that make me laugh, writing to relieve emotional pain, etc. I try to remember all the people and things I love. Sometimes it only takes something little to make you feel happy again.
I understand how hard it is to overcome intense sadness, but sometimes it helps to have the love and support of at least one close person that you trust. Your loved ones won’t judge you. I know the thought of clinical help might scare you, but it might be very helpful for you. You can seek help from a third-person individual, and he/she will do their best to help you (counselling, medication, treatment, ect.) You don’t have to let depression take over your life; you can overcome it. I know this sounds cheesy, but you have to believe that you’re strong enough. You are strong enough. You can move on from this. I believe you can, xx.
I wanted to be able to talk to people without potentially crowding my main blog (virgin-unicorn) with asks. I enjoy helping others with their problems, especially from the third person view.
Thank you! I’m trying my best to help, xx.
Not at all. I’m glad I waited until I did because he and I were very compatible. And it wasn’t a rushed affair. I lost my virginity while watching a documentary, and contrary to what others might think, it was almost perfect for me. I say almost because nothing is ever perfect when you’re losing your virginity. Anyway, I was slightly sad that I wasn’t a virgin unicorn afterwards (see previous post for explanation), but I am very happy about my first time. Also… I can say that I lost my virginity to an English man ;) xx
Well, I’ve always been a sexual person - just not in the actual physical sense. I wasn’t interested in dating anyone, so it just never happened. And truthfully, I didn’t really care. I really did like being a virgin. But I met someone in England, and I guess you can say that he and I just clicked. And I felt comfortable enough to become intimate with him. I think that was the most important thing. And knowing that it wasn’t just about the sex. Sometimes you just know.
Well, first I should tell you that I was a virgin until I was almost 19. And I was proud of it. I was known as the virgin unicorn because nowadays, virgins are rare like unicorns. I do not think it’s anything to be ashamed of, and your friends sound immature for making fun of you. You should never do anything that you don’t feel ready to do. Sex shouldn’t be something you “just get it over with.” I’m not saying it has to be with The One, but it’s still a serious matter. And whether or not you think your virginity is important or special, you should always respect yourself. But hey, if you really like this guy, and you want to take it to the next level, it is your choice. But remember, you can always say “no” if you’re not ready. Hope this helped, xx.
I don’t have a lot of experience, but of course, I’ll try :)